13 November 2012

And I haven't felt so alive, in years

My brain has been all over the map the last week.  The election stirred up too much in me, and much of it I can't get out of my head.  No, no, don't run for the hills - I'm not about to talk politics and issues.  Half the time I don't even know where I stand, so why should I subject anyone else to my rambling?

Mostly, it has made me introspective.  Thinking about life, how much things have changed since I couldn't wait to be a "grown up".  Thinking about what the near future and the far future hold for me, my family, my loved ones, everyone really.  I suspect I am probably not even close to alone in these thoughts.

I had the opportunity yesterday to have two very different interactions with people I have never met and never will.  The first was during the course of work, where I get to talk to people all day long.  Usually its not personal and not long.  Occasionally though, I run across someone who really likes to talk for one reason or another.  Yes, it's in the course of work and I should stay professional but as I also like to talk a fair amount, I almost always fall prey to the talkers.  This call was from an elderly woman in the morning that still has me thinking.  How amazing is that?  Someone I have never met shared life experiences and life advice with me that was meaningful, insightful and greatly appreciated.  I actually took NOTES while she was giving me the advice.

That conversation made me realize that so many of the things we seek answers and solutions to can't be solved.    Answers that we look for can only come from experiences we have and the life we lead.  On top of that, why are we even looking?  I know I personally do way too much thinking about things that make no difference in the grand scheme of my existence.  I have become a lot more focused on the things that I should be seeking answers to lately,  Other than that, it seems a lot more important to focus on things front and center.

The other experience was on a blog I had never read written by a man I have never met.  I came across the blog after seeing a twitter post about someone who had recently passed away.  The man lives in the area and had suffered from stage 4 inoperable lung cancer for the last two years.  The blog existed before he got sick, but became his story about his illness and how he dealt with it after he was diagnosed.  I spent a good 2 hours looking through this blog.  The strength of this man was inspirational.  Realizing that he needed to enjoy his life, he spent the 2 years before he died with his family and travelling.  He traveled to every single state and part of Canada on his motorcycle, because he wanted to.  It took many, many trips between relapses and treatment.  He did it with many different groups of friends.  He chose to experience life to the fullest.

After marveling at his stories, I found myself wondering if I could do that.  Knowing that the end was coming, could I chose joy and turn it around?  You know the people around him just wanted to bundle him up and keep him close.  I hope that if something like that ever happens in my life (not trying to be morbid, by the way) that I can embrace life and make it count.  Sounds cliche but isn't that would we should be doing?  Living life and enjoying every moment?

OK.  I feel better getting that out.  And I look forward to the next time I have an interaction that truly makes me think.  I promise to keep it light next time.  - S

2 comments:

Unknown said...

The moon, is shining in the sky. Reminding me of so many other nights. But they're not like tonight!

I have thought of that song DOZENS of times when I am getting pumped up to appreciate what is in front of me right now.

Fun to run across people you would normally never meet who make you think. Wonderful too to intersect with people you know, who thing like you. :-)

Unknown said...

The moon, is shining in the sky. Reminding me of so many other nights. But they're not like tonight!

I have thought of that song DOZENS of times when I am getting pumped up to appreciate what is in front of me right now.

Fun to run across people you would normally never meet who make you think. Wonderful too to intersect with people you know, who thing like you. :-)