Existing

Haven't blogged in a bit.  A full month, actually.  Not that there hasn't been excitement in my life, its just that, well, the excitement is not all that exciting!

I did actually look for, apply for and get a job.  And started.  Still feeling my way around and trying to make it my place.  Part of the problem of working in one restaurant for so many years is that co-workers became close friends and just walking into the building became like home.  The place I worked in the hellhole was never like that.  I'm hopeful the new place will be better.  Everyone is a bit older and most of the servers have been there for years.  That speaks VOLUMES in this industry.  But like I said, still feeling it out.

I am not so happy to say we are still living at the inlaws.  Never in my wildest nightmares did I anticipate being here this long, but circumstances are what they are.  We are now actively looking for a place and as soon as we get one?  Hasta la vista baby!  To say I'm excited would be just a tad of an understatement.  I've never longed for my own space and privacy so much in my life.

And yes, the insanity continues.  Its become almost a joke how often I hear MIL gossiping about me.  Trust me on this one peeps, I absolutely do not do anything so exciting or scandalous enough to warrant the amount of time spent gossiping about me.  I sometimes wish I did!  Most of the time I'm not working is spent hidden in the bedroom.  When we are both off, we are generally not here at all.  Who knew I was so intriguing?

We continue to explore our new place, which is amazing fun.  It is indescribably beautiful here this time of year.  It gets humid, sometimes a bit warm but it is so green!  I told Mikey yesterday that I never realized I had a need for trees in my life.  I do.  I love them.  Maybe I will get used to them and long for the desert?

So for now we are settling in to summer and planning for the future.  See?  Not so exciting.

What to read, what to read?

I love to read.  I've always loved to read.  I was THAT kid, the one that always had a book and preferred to go to the library than almost anywhere else over the summer.  This habit has done me well through life, particularly because not only do I love to read, but I read fast.  Like, superfast.  That was great when I was in school.  I could get through things quickly and easily.  If I have a lot of books lying around at any given point in time, life is grand.  If not, things get ugly.

Case in point.  We are currently residing with my husband's parents.  We moved across country and we are staying with them until we get "established", whatever that means.  What it means to me is that it better be soon or my sanity is forever threatened, but that is a totally different post.

I have a lot of books on my laptop that I will read when hubby is at work and not trying to hog it for himself to farm, read Bill Simmons or chat with his fantasy sports geek buddies.  (We really need two laptops.  Maybe in my rich life?)  When he has the laptop and I don't have anything to read, well, I have been experimenting.  I finished all the books I had in fairly short order after arriving here.  Then I started to browse through the inlaws library.  Hmm.  There was a Patricia Cornwell I hadn't yet read and a couple other mystery/crime novels that were good fun.  Then desperation sets in.  Danielle Steel.  Ugh.  I know my sister and I used to read her when we would sneak the books from my mom in high school.  We thought we were oh so scandalous.

I've since moved on to other forms of smut, oops, I mean "romance" novels.  Nora Roberts is my personal favorite for complete escapism.  So it had been years since I opened a Danielle Steel book.  A-W-F-U-L.  Almost unbearable.  I say almost because of course I read them, I had to read something, didn't I?  Don't get me wrong, I am not a literary snob.  I'll read almost anything if it keeps my interest.  But this is just bad.  One of those experiences where I feel slightly dumber when I finish.  I'm not knocking anyone who enjoys her work, don't get me wrong.  I just remember her stuff being a little more entertaining.  Maybe she's out of original material?  I dunno.

Sound to anyone like I need a trip to Borders or Barnes and Noble stat??

Rest in peace sweet Eva

Not sure how many of you followed her blog or knew her story, but cystic fibrosis warrior Eva passed away this morning after an epic battle. I know her family and friends can be sure she is now at peace after so many struggles.

http://65redroses.livejournal.com/139488.html

Oh, the trouble I've seen

I love being a mom.  I really do.  But there are definitely things that I miss about being childless.  Like right now - I would so much rather be watching One Life to Live or the Mets/Cardinals game.  Instead.. "Snow Buddies".  Sigh.  So much to sacrifice for a few rare moments of peace with the 4 year old.  And believe it or not, he is sitting on the couch, completely quiet and mostly still.  Amazing.

Then there is sleep.  Ah, precious sleep.  If you aren't a sleep person, you won't get it.  I adore sleep.  I crave it. I always have, even as a kid.  My dad was a notorious napper..I blame it on genes.  Giving up sleep, or at least uninterrupted at-will sleep has been one of the more difficult transitions I have had to make as a parent.  I can't wait until my kids are old enough to WANT to sleep in.

Of course I miss my size 4 pre-parenthood figure.  And on the sleep subject (see?  I have a one track mind!) I really miss sleeping on my stomach.  Its not that I can't, I just don't anymore.  I was so trained to sleep on my side after 4 babies that I still do it.

I miss being able to go out on a whim.  I miss shopping without an agenda or plan.  I miss being able to do anything spontaneous, quite honestly.

I miss not having to worry, 24/7.  But alas, that comes with the territory.  I am now a constant worrier.  I come up with ridiculous scenarios about various ills that may befall my kiddos.  OCD much?

Yet, these are the sacrifices that we gladly make..right??  Sure they are!  Although I personally can't wait to be a parent of grown children.  :)

cups and fishicide

I'm missing my littles today.  As I recline on the couch watching "Wizards of Wiverly/Wizerly Place the Movie" (how Bay says it depends on the moment) I wonder what they are doing right now.  The time zone difference screws me up.  Its almost noon here, but for them its probably morning recess.  And I bet its warm, dammit.

I have been talking to them almost nightly lately, its as if they sense my missing them and want to fill me in on their days.  Dilly, or "Orange-y", in particular.  He gave me a near 5 minute lecture this weekend on how if Bay is really serious about playing t-ball it is very important that he not forget to wear a cup.  *snickers* I totally needed a long conversation with a 7 year old about boy junk.  He also sweetly offered to send Bay his old t-ball gear - including his cup.  Um, thanks Dill.  I think we can handle it.  I want to laugh every time I even think about him.  His typical response to anything I tell him is "Oh my god."  Spoken almost in one word.    Dramatic much?

They got new fish this weekend.  Some sort of African fish that apparently eats other fish.  It seems their dad wanted to start fresh in the tank.  I didn't ask.  Sometimes its better not to know.  Dilly thought it was cool.  Logan really couldn't care less.  Cassie, on the other hand, described to me how she took her favorite fish and  proceeded to "free" it, Nemo style, down the toilet, rather than risk fish murder at the hands of the new African fish.  Ummm, ok.  No, I didn't take it any further.  She's going to end up being a vet.  Or maybe a lion tamer.  Either way.  Although she was channeling her inner me, doing her science project on the very last night of the very last day of Spring Break.  Nope, not me!

As long as I maintain some level of knowledge about video games, Logan and I could talk for hours.  He is so calm and so cool.  I love that about him.  Yes, he gets emotional.  But he is such an even-keeled child.  So UNlike his mama.  I won't lie and say that I don't intentionally try to rile him up.  ;)

I can't wait for them to come out and experience this new place.  They are going to love it, its so completely different than anything my Southwest born and bred children have ever experienced.  Just about 2 months.  I can't wait.

Detox

Seriously.  I feel like I need basketball rehab after this weekend.  And lets be totally honest -- its not just this weekend.  As I find myself, well, without work or purpose in general, I've watched basketball from pre-conference tournaments through this last weekend pretty much every day.  I'm a junkie.  And its not even baseball season yet.

The lowlight of the weekend for me is two-fold.  The first is what didn't happen, that is Arizona not being in the field for the first time in a bazillion years.  The second was my upstart NMSU Aggies getting oh-so-close to beating Michigan State.  (Mikey and I still maintain they got screwed by the refs, but that's neither here nor there)  We were watching the game at a bar and there were more than a few people there that were shooting me strange glances as I yelled at the TV.  We live in Kentucky.  If you don't bleed blue, I'm not sure they get it.

Notice I leave out how badly the Horns sucked.  It doesn't even deserve mention.  And I could write a thesis on the Lobos, but I won't.

The highlight was also two-fold and has to do with underdogs.  I have liked St. Marys for awhile, I have a love for the West Coast Conference that dates back a long time.  This team of theirs this year is scrappy, ugly, spastic and oh so fun to watch.  I hope they win it all, I really do.  Not to mention most of their starters are from Australia.  What's that all about?

And the highest of highlights is of course Kansas.  Oh, thank you Northern Iowa.  I couldn't have scripted it better.  It maimed my bracket.  I could care less.  I cackled, yes, cackled, like a maniac for longer than was necessary.  This time it was my in-laws who looked at me like I was certifiable.  Glad I could oblige.  :)

Today it is cold, wet and basketball free and we are all worn out.  Tired, maybe a bit sick and completely basketball hungover.  Perfect day for a baseball game, huh?

Snuggie time

Yep, its cold again. I call NOT FAIR! It warmed up, I swear it did..if only for a few days. Even with rain, it was bearable outside. The last couple of days its been all I can do to get out from underneath a blanket or the dreaded Snuggie. I fought the Snuggie tooth and nail and for those of you that haven't had the pleasure of experiencing one, its even more ridiculous than it appears on tv.  It doesn't stay closed and one size fits all my ass.  But for a glorified blanket, it will work in a pinch.

I am ready for spring.  Everyone keeps assuring me it will be worth it once everything comes up green and glorious.  I believe them.  Once the feet of snow melted, there was actual green grass underneath.  Amazing!  But a little warmth wouldn't hurt anything, I promise.  I don't need sweltering heat, just enough so that I can put on some flip flops.  Just enough so that I don't have to wear my winter coat or God forbid, the Snuggie to the Reds game during opening week.

The one thing conspicuously absent though?  March means wind to me.  I grew up in the Southwest, that is what I am programmed to expect.  In Albuquerque and even worse in the townthatshallnotbenamed this time of year, you can expect to grind dirt particles in your teeth all day if you dare to step outside.  I definitely don't miss the wind, and neither do my contacts.

So Ferb, I know what we are going to do today.  Hunker down under our Snuggies and dream of spring.  I know its out there, lurking, teasing me.